Monday 30 April 2012

Editor goes A.W.O.L.



Auto Posto São Mateus in Carrancas (pronounced Cahhunkas), Minas Gerais, Brazil's Petrol Station is up for the Blue Star Garage look-a-like Award 2012.


Dearest Hampsters!

It would appear that editor of the Hampstead Village Voice, your very own Emmanuel Mustafa Goldstein has gone absent without leave. Said editor was last spotted at this charming little petrol station in the small mountain town of Carrancas, somewhere in Brazil.

A spokesperson for the CIA who have been keeping tabs on Mr. Goldstein for alleged, un-American activities in the name of Hampstonian independence admitted, "We've lost him for now but we do know he was in the Cahhancas area last week."

Meanwhile, Hampstonia prepares for the 5th anniversary edition of the Hampstead Village Voice, some of which may have been written in the back room of the above petrol station. M16 have suggested it will be out in July and will almost certainly contain a centre-page commiseration of Tesco-Stressco's 10 years in Heath Street.

Viva La Blue Star Garage!

Juanita Rugenstein v. Frognal. 
The Contessa Juanita Rugenstein von Frognal.
pp. Emmanuel Mustafa Goldstein A.W.O.L.


Wednesday 11 April 2012

Spring Edition Doing Splendidly!


Above: the poster currently adorning Hampstead's bill boards

Hello Hampsters!

Apparently edition 15 of the Hampstead Village Voice is selling like hot cakes. This may be in no small part to the horrendous name dropping going on in my absence.

Apparently, whilst I'm off sunning myself by various pools in Brazil (ed. well, naturally I've been borrowing a couple of millionaires houses, as you do), Professor P. Dant will - at his leisure - be on grotty old poster duty and dropping names like nobody's business. Good show Professor and, needless to say, we all look forward to your next enlightening piece in the Summer edition of Hampstead's only, and therefore favourite, satirical magazine.

Oh, yes, and do have a peak at all those exclusive pictures of Stevie Wonder, Thierry Henry, Peter O'Toole and Co. in the current Hampstead Village Voice. No, don't just leaf through it at the newsagent - buy the bloody thing you cheapskate!

Toodle Pip!

Emmanuel Mustafa Goldstein x x x
Editor in Ronnie Biggs' old thong.



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